I am a married man. A father of 2 beautiful kids and i recently found out i am HIV postive. My wife knows about it. She also knows i am bisexual and since finding out i do men, she has renounced having anything sexual to do with me. Why didnt she divorce me you might ask, because of the stigma associated with divorcing your husband in the part of Nigeria we come from. We live in the same house, cater to our children and run financial expenses together, but never have sex together. I dont even have the libido and i know she gets her sexual fantasies satiated by other men.
Here in Canada, things are way different, i am free to be openly gay, but i keep it on the wraps, being open to only a few friends and family, so as to prevent a big scandal so as my people back in Nigeria won't know the truth. I love my children, and they are one of the reasons i live, so i have made up my mind not to let HIV or any other disease take me away from them. I have made the resolve to be strong, and do things right from now on, no wild unprotected sexual orgies, no crazy weekend hangouts etc.
At first when i came out to my wife during our family summer vacation in Montreal, she was angry and warned me not to mention it again, that i should pray harder and ask God to cure of this mid life crises, but the sad truth is that i was born this way. I have always been gay and will always be gay... Nothing can change that fact. Reality however dawned on her when she caught a neigbour and myself in bed getting our groove on, when i supposedly thought she had gone to work. That day i felt like scum, she cried, cursed and swore, but i was cormforted by the fact that i had opened up to her a few months back. Then caame the silent treatment, and weeks later she called me to a meeting in our bedroom, reading out new rules concerning how we were going to lead our lives, no intercourse unless i went for deliverance with a popular pastor in the Ikotun area of Lagos. I refused, and up until now, although things haven't been rosy, she has slowly come to accept my being a hoomosexual... It's something i cant change.
Okay readers, thanks for going through this piece, i feel a little lighter because i have shared a part of my journey with you, i hope to make it a regular on this page. Also i want to say thank you to Samuel Ola the owner of this blog (areaguys.blogspot.com) for giving me this window of opportunity to write. I thought it was a joke when he said he was going to resume blogging... SEE YA!
*Signing Out: E. E. Anowa